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I just worked out in Frozen headphones

Rachel O'Reilly

 @choosetorun

@choosetorun

By Courtney Ward

This morning I did my usual routine of getting my child to preschool, followed by crossing off that first to do item which is a workout. I’m not some die-hard spinner, cross-fit, step class addicted Mama, but I like to get a solid hour walk or yoga class in first thing to ensure I have a small portion of the day just to myself. It helps me shake off a hectic morning of getting my daughter to eat more than one bite of waffle, convincing her not to dump cereal on the dog’s head, and filling her Frozen lunch box with something that resembles a healthy and edible meal.

I pulled up to one of my favorite walks. The sun was calling my name and the spring crisp air was crystal clear. I was all amped and ready to go when I realized that I forgot my headphones. Panic started to set in. I had a couple of my favorite podcasts all lined up to entertain me and doing an hour walk with just my thoughts was the most unappealing thing ever. I didn’t have enough time to run home to get mine and still get everything else done that I needed to, so I dug through my car searching for an extra set. I must have ten pairs of the uncomfortable, tangled Apple headphones lying around at all times, how could I not today!?

Then I saw it - my daughter’s Frozen headphones sitting in her seat, in all of their full coverage, ear-muffed glory. A thought went through my head and my first reaction was oh no - no way could I. Followed by, well shit, looks like this is happening. And ending with, fuck it, let’s ride Elsa.

Full disclosure here Disney, you make terrible headphones. The poor quality is, undoubtedly, the reason my daughter must have missed half of the lessons Daniel Tiger was telling her on our last road trip, which must be why she won’t, “Try new food because it might taste good.”

I looked around as I set out, but not before snapping a quick, proud selfie that I sent to my non-parent girlfriends with a simple text: 

"Your future"

The path was unusually busy. So many thoughts were running through my head. What if one of the new cool Mom’s from my daughter’s preschool saw me? Of course today would be the day I run into an ex - decidedly unambiguous headphones angled weirdly on my head because they were designed for someone who may or may not be potty trained. Clearly I wasn’t going to impress anyone over the age of four with my new accessory, never mind the thought of possibly running into an ex. Of course, if it were going to happen, this would be the time right?

Parenting is all about compromising and throwing any scrap of dignity you ever had directly out the window - you get a crash course in that the day you give birth.

Four years in and I’m still surprised that I am willing to “Let it go” as much as I do, and to be honest, I am not quite at peace with that yet. Part of me feels like I am so far removed from the person I was before I had my daughter. Little by little I am learning to embrace the new me, because I have realized that change is mostly good, even when it comes disguised as a pair of Disney headphones.